Cohabitation is a new alternative living arrangement that has come to be accepted in this current generation. Cohabitation is majorly defined as an emotional, physical and intellectually intimate relationship which includes a common living place and which exists without the benefit of legal, cultural and religious sanction, ‘come we stay’.
Most university relationships have resulted to cohabitation despite condemnation by the African traditional society and religious leaders at large. Two students from Chuka University share their experiences.
It’s barely 6 months after John**, aged 21 came to terms with the repercussion of cohabitation. John who resides in one of the hostels around the university expressed how he had gone through hell when he moved in with a lady from the Faculty of Nursing.
The two met at a house party in Mungoni area of Ndagani early last year. They later become good friends that resulted to dating and moving in together immediately after. What started as a sleepover turned into a ‘marriage’.
The two shared responsibilities in the house. John explained that life was simple since the two had different class schedule but as time moved by things began going astray. The lady she was dating demanded for more than he had expected and could provide. Stress crept in as John** was forced to ask money more often than he used to ask for from home.
John** would later see it wise to terminate the relationship. It was not easy for him as the lady insisted on staying in the relationship for pride. He explained the main reason he decided to call off the relationship was after he failed to buy commodities required to run the house.
Mellissa**, a third-year student from the Faculty of Science, Engineering and Technology, also aged 21 explained how she found herself cohabitating with a married man ‘sponsor’ early this year. “I used to see my friends post on social media how they had fun on weekends, I admired their lifestyle that included flashy makeup and fancy-dress codes,” she said.
Mellissa** succumbed to pressure and moved in with a married man in Chuka. The man, 42 years of age spent money on her by taking her out and buying her the products and goods in form of gifts in return for sex.
After nearly seven months of shared moments, the truth about the relationship between her and the man came to light and was known by the man’s wife. Confronted with the revelation, she made the difficult decision to leave, ultimately relocating to an apartment near school. This pivotal moment followed an attempt to undergo an abortion, which tragically resulted in a miscarriage.
The bitterness of her thoughts continues to haunt her, a consequence of the choices driven by greed.
According to the prevailing laws, a couple cohabiting without the intention of marriage cannot be automatically recognized as a married union until they choose to wed voluntarily. This legal stance poses a particular risk for many university students engaged in cohabitation, as their unions are not officially acknowledged, and any outcomes are addressed on an individual basis.
**not their real names
The Writer, Purity Benjamin is a First Year Applied Computer Science Student at Chuka University.
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